Staredit Network > Forums > Null > Topic: Dating Advice
Dating Advice
Oct 4 2010, 2:50 pm
By: Norm
Pages: 1 2 35 >
 

Oct 4 2010, 2:50 pm Norm Post #1



Hello. My name is Norm and my expertise has been requested by Taylor Swift. He has asked that I stop by and offer advice to the people of SEN in regards to the realm of dating and relationships. I hesitated for a moment, but quickly realized that I was more than happy to fulfill this request.

Now, being on a nerd site just like the rest of you, I'm sure that there is reason for people unfamiliar with my history to be skeptical. That's fine, but I will now offer my credentials:

1. I have survived many encounters with females in the past. The most recent encounter lasting over 3 years and still continues to this day relentlessly.
2. I have thoroughly tamed at least 1 female.
3. I have a 25:1 win ratio playing 'the game' that torments many people new to the dating scene
4. I have a deep understanding of the way a female brain works due to the amount of confrontations I have been in.



Current cases: (None)






Help is available to all, and the only cost is that your dilemma is displayed in this topic as entertainment to others.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 5:14 pm rockz Post #2

ᴄʜᴇᴇsᴇ ɪᴛ!

Help, I can't find any women I find attractive.



"Parliamentary inquiry, Mr. Chairman - do we have to call the Gentleman a gentleman if he's not one?"

Oct 4 2010, 5:22 pm Aristocrat Post #3



I have had no substantial issues with my relationship; both of us are happy with it, but judging from what I have read over the internet, this is apparently not the norm. Am I doing something wrong?



None.

Oct 4 2010, 5:24 pm Norm Post #4



Quote from rockz
Help, I can't find any women I find attractive.

1. Where are you looking?
2. What types of things do you automatically consider unattractive?
3. Are you sure your reproductive organs are functioning properly?


Quote from Aristocrat
I have had no substantial issues with my relationship; both of us are happy with it, but judging from what I have read over the internet, this is apparently not the norm. Am I doing something wrong?

Yes, either you or your partner are ignorant to some aspects of the relationship. (Depending on what aspects these are) this is probably not a big enough problem to worry about, but side effects of being in this state may arise at a later time in the relationship and cause even bigger issues.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 5:28 pm Doodan Post #5



How do I get a girl's number? :blush:



None.

Oct 4 2010, 5:33 pm Azrael Post #6



Quote from Norm
Quote from Aristocrat
I have had no substantial issues with my relationship; both of us are happy with it, but judging from what I have read over the internet, this is apparently not the norm. Am I doing something wrong?

Yes, either you or your partner are ignorant to some aspects of the relationship.

You're not as experienced as you make yourself out to be if you think no one can be happy in a healthy relationship.

Although, you said you've dated 25 women for every 1 that turned you down. This would indicate that you're not very successful in relationships, since you so frequently need to find a new person to date.

I guess you'd be the guy to talk to if someone has questions about the initial step of a relationship though.




Oct 4 2010, 5:34 pm Norm Post #7



Quote from Doodan
How do I get a girl's number? :blush:

There are a lot of methods:

1. Ask her, and hope she doesn't lie.
2. Look it up in a phone book.
3. Ask somebody who knows it to tell it to you.
4. Get put in a situation where an exchange in phone numbers is expected / normal.

The list goes on, but the most important thing to remember is "It's not how you get the number, it's what you do with it."

Quote from name:Azrael.Wrath
Quote from Norm
Quote from Aristocrat
I have had no substantial issues with my relationship; both of us are happy with it, but judging from what I have read over the internet, this is apparently not the norm. Am I doing something wrong?

Yes, either you or your partner are ignorant to some aspects of the relationship.

You're not as experienced as you make yourself out to be if you think no one can be happy in a healthy relationship.

It's a good thing no one here thinks that... It doesn't matter if two people are the happiest couple of all time, there will still always be issues.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 5:38 pm Azrael Post #8



Quote from Norm
It doesn't matter if two people are the happiest couple of all time, there will still always be issues.

Except he said there have been no substantial issues, with "substantial" being the keyword.




Oct 4 2010, 5:44 pm Norm Post #9



"substantial" is subjective and should be analyzed at a case by case basis. What's 'not a big deal' to one, may be a big deal to another. The point is that there are always issues, and not being aware of any of them can complicate the relationship and even resurface later in the relationship to cause problems. This isn't always the case, but it is what normally is the case.

With that being said, stop trolling.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 6:10 pm MadZombie Post #10



Norm, I just want a chub who I can play video games with and doesn't really care about love and stuff. What do I need do? Where can I find someone like that?



None.

Oct 4 2010, 6:14 pm Norm Post #11



Quote from name:f(._. )z
Norm, I just want a chub who I can play video games with and doesn't really care about love and stuff. What do I need do? Where can I find someone like that?

These kind of girls are everywhere lately, so it shouldn't be that hard to find. You don't need much, just act chill and have some cool video games at your house to play.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 6:16 pm rockz Post #12

ᴄʜᴇᴇsᴇ ɪᴛ!

Quote from Norm
Quote from rockz
Help, I can't find any women I find attractive.

1. Where are you looking?
2. What types of things do you automatically consider unattractive?
3. Are you sure your reproductive organs are functioning properly?
1. Churches, restaurants, grocery stores, bars/clubs, classes, etc...
2. Short legs and non-red hair.
3. Let me check. Edit: Yep.

Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Oct 4 2010, 6:19 pm by rockz. Reason: yep



"Parliamentary inquiry, Mr. Chairman - do we have to call the Gentleman a gentleman if he's not one?"

Oct 4 2010, 6:19 pm Roy Post #13

An artist's depiction of an Extended Unit Death

Quote from name:f(._. )z
Norm, I just want a chub who I can play video games with and doesn't really care about love and stuff. What do I need do? Where can I find someone like that?
I think I saw a list of people like that somewhere... Oh, here.

Norm, my girlfriend is the jealous type. She would flip out over things like some girl joining my forum game. Is there a remedy for this?

Oh, also, last night when I stopped for gas on my way back to Utah, some chick came up to me and told me her wallet was stolen, so I gave her a few gallons to get home. I told my girlfriend the story, but kept it gender-neutral ("They were out of gas, so I helped them"). Was that a good move? Should I have not mentioned the story at all? Should I have not kept it gender-neutral?




Oct 4 2010, 6:19 pm MadZombie Post #14



Quote
non-red hair
Disgusting. You and Ex both.

I hate any hair that isn't brunnete. Blue is okay though. Though I think you should consider rockz's (<'s?) age as a factor.

HEY NORM

I was talking to my friend about girls that other day and I asked him why I wasn't getting any. He told me that I should "Spit Game".

How does one Spit Game? Can you teach me.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 6:21 pm ClansAreForGays Post #15



I thought I already gave the best girl advice here?

Also, I see azrael trolling this thread into the ground.

I'll go first, and yes this is real.

Scenario: Tonight I'm going out to see a movie (Catfish) with a girl from my past. And it's just us, so it's kinda a date.

History: In the past, she had a huge crush on me. I did not find her attractive(she was a lil chubby), so I consistently shot her down, and forced her into the friend zone. Not long after, she somehow manages to get a guy I can safely say is hotter than me. Suddenly, she loses all the weight, and is actually very hot now, maybe out of my league even. Anyways, he finds a hotter girl, and treats my friend like shit so that she'll break up with him. I've hung out with her since, and never got that old 'this girl likes me' feeling from her.

Hypothesis: It bugs her that I never liked her back, and she's just trying to get me to lower my guard, and tell her I like her, just so she can feel vindicated, and then proceed to drop me off a cliff.

Advice to rekindle her old dead feelings?




Oct 4 2010, 6:25 pm Norm Post #16



Quote from rockz
Quote from Norm
Quote from rockz
Help, I can't find any women I find attractive.

1. Where are you looking?
2. What types of things do you automatically consider unattractive?
3. Are you sure your reproductive organs are functioning properly?
1. Churches, restaurants, grocery stores, bars/clubs, classes, etc...
2. Short legs and non-red hair.
3. Let me check. Edit: Yep.

You just gotta keep looking, man. She's out there somewhere and hopefully not already with a different guy.
Quote from Roy
Norm, my girlfriend is the jealous type. She would flip out over things like some girl joining my forum game. Is there a remedy for this?

I would not suggest trying to remedy jealous girlfriends, that just means they love you a lot (maybe too much). However, if you ever decide to end the relationship, you may need some assistance or a restraining order.
Quote from Roy
Oh, also, last night when I stopped for gas on my way back to Utah, some chick came up to me and told me her wallet was stolen, so I gave her a few gallons to get home. I told my girlfriend the story, but kept it gender-neutral ("They were out of gas, so I helped them"). Was that a good move? Should I have not mentioned the story at all? Should I have not kept it gender-neutral?

You did the right thing, don't worry.
Quote from name:f(._. )z
HEY NORM

I was talking to my friend about girls that other day and I asked him why I wasn't getting any. He told me that I should "Spit Game".

I can tell from this that your friend is infinitely more wise than me, perhaps you should seek advice from him instead.


Quote from ClansAreForGays
Scenario: Tonight I'm going out to see a movie (Catfish) with a girl from my past. And it's just us, so it's kinda a date.

History: In the past, she had a huge crush on me. I did not find her attractive(she was a lil chubby), so I consistently shot her down, and forced her into the friend zone. Not long after, she somehow manages to get a guy I can safely say is hotter than me. Suddenly, she loses all the weight, and is actually very hot now, maybe out of my league even. Anyways, he finds a hotter girl, and treats my friend like shit so that she'll break up with him. I've hung out with her since, and never got that old 'this girl likes me' feeling from her.

Hypothesis: It bugs her that I never liked her back, and she's just trying to get me to lower my guard, and tell her I like her, just so she can feel vindicated, and then proceed to drop me off a cliff.

Advice to rekindle her old dead feelings?

Play it normal. If you can remember how you acted back then, try to keep in character. This will prevent you from falling victim of possible revenge. Girls generally don't plan things in the long term, so if she is using her newly acquired good looks to bait and drop you, she's expecting you to pick up on it fast. However, by acting cool you will send the message that she's actually not in a position to do this. Girls are only as attractive as guys tell them they are, remember that.

If you play it casually, you will see her true intentions. Girls will tell you what they want... eventually. Go to the movie, have fun, and don't make a big deal about it. If you start to get the feeling that she's still attracted to you and not planning revenge, just stick with it. You can either make the move when the time is right, or wait for her to do it herself if you're feeling weary. There are also advanced techniques to provoke females into admitting feelings for you sooner, but don't worry about them for now.

Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Oct 4 2010, 6:32 pm by Norm.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 7:45 pm Ultraviolet Post #17



Is it true if someone doesn't 'use it' they 'lose it'?




Oct 4 2010, 9:49 pm Norm Post #18



Quote from Ultraviolet
Is it true if someone doesn't 'use it' they 'lose it'?

You're going to have to be more specific with your issue if you want me to help you.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 10:02 pm Bar Refaeli Post #19



So I've been dating this girl for 8 months and I love her
I put no one above her for a minute
I wanna make her the mother of my children but there's just one other thing
I went and bought her an engagement ring just to show her what she means to me
See she's never been mean to me
But recently it seems she's been holding things secretly
So I asked her about it and it was nothing
She told me she was stressed so I guessed I was just buggin'
Said it's something at work she said it's something in film
She's a set director or something so I'm chill
Til one day wen I was at home alone
I figured I should follow my bone so I headed to the CPU
Nothing to do but zoom through some pictures of some girl
And then one came through with a picture of a girl getting sprayed in the face
Wait a minute that's the bitch I date.



None.

Oct 4 2010, 10:32 pm MadZombie Post #20



That's not a question



None.

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