Me: “Now, double-click on the little icon that says Internet Explorer.”

Client: “I can’t do that. I’m Christian. I don’t believe in icons.”

Me: “Fine then. Double-click on the little image that says Internet Explorer.”

Client: “Okay.”

Me: “The password is ‘123456’.”

Client: “Upper or lower case?”

Client: “I decided I want one of the illustrations you already did for my logo and I am going to use it for the background on my checks.”

Me: “A logo is usually a simple graphic used to represent your business, in your case, the book series and characters. The illustrations are a bit too detailed for that purpose. How about I simplify the characters and series title and create a logo?”

Client: “Why can’t you just shrink the picture down to the size of the check?”

Me: “The artwork is 12” square and proportionally will not work in a rectangle.”

Client: “Wait, hold on… you know I don’t understand you when you use those technical terms.”

Me: “By proportionally I mean…”

Client: “No not that word, the other one you said. It won’t work in a what?”

Me: “Rectangle?”

Client: “Yes.”

Me: “Um, a rectangle is the shape of your checkbook.”

Client: “Oh ok.”