You go back, turn north and then east.
Choices: west - north - south
death looms over you

North, because if it looms over us we usually think that of that as north

As a sidenote, I'd like to point out that highlighting text in every freaking post just to read it is a lil annoying.

Note: Are the only permissible choices North-South-East-West etc., or can we also have context-specific verbs? Things like 'Pull lever', Up, or 'talk'?

Anyway...

You pass through a narrow gothic archway and enter a large stone chamber with a high, vaulted ceiling. Sinister-looking winged gargoyles leer down at you from the walls - their eyes appear to follow you as you move. A 15 foot tall statue of Death, carved from black stone, stands on a plinth against the northern wall. In his right hand he holds his scythe, and his left arm is outstretched, pointing East. There is writing on the plinth but you cannot make it out from this distance. Behind Death on the Northern wall are three stained-glass windows which stretch almost to the ceiling; the windows depict a Biblical scene which you do not recognise. Closed doors lead East and West.

Options: North, West, East.

I choose to closely examine the statue before heading over to the door on the west side of the room.

... *sigh* screw this, I make a map for nothing, you didn't even make it to the chamber yet, and cpt. Will is randomely taking control even after I made the map, I made the rules, I marked clues. There were no clues yet, because you didn't even make it to the first corridor where you find the corpse in a jail cell. Whatever, I quit... >_>

Perhaps, if you don't want the game to fall apart, you should have explained the rules a little better. I thought it was an "open" forum game, not a closed one with a single narrator; that's how I've usually played these games before. I apologise if I messed it up.

I think this would have been better if we started with an inventory. Or at least get to choose your class and birth sign.

:C

For future reference, I strongly suggest giving more details for the players, even if there's nothing interesting at each corner. What makes these sort of RP games interesting is the ability to imagine the game as if it's real. That's really difficult when all we have is "You move. Your choice is now X or Y." That makes the game even more bleak than perhaps intended. Will's post may not have anything to do with your plan for this game, but it was certainly more interesting than anything you've posted for this game.

You also might want to start with a better description to start us off. "You wake up in a dark yet eerily barren room..." or "You find yourselves in a dark hallway. Unsure of how you got there or where it leads, you choose to press on."

Example: You turn East into a narrow corridor, with torches too high for you to grab. You notice a small crack on the wall to your left, and get the feeling that somebody is watching you. You get nervouse and quickly come to another split part, with another opening to the South. You take out your torche, light it up, and take a look at the Southern path. You walk into a large chamber, with a prison cell containing a ravaged carcase, still fresh, and completely mutalated. You decide that it is not worth the risk taking that direction, so you turn back, and continue heading East. As you progress through the hallway, you start to realizethat the plain, rough, concrete walls begin to seem damp, and you instictavely think of blood. With the thought of blood, and the mutalated carcase in your mind, you don't seem to realize a tall, human like figure approaching you from behind. You turn around at the last second, only to realize it's too late. You were snatched by a man, unable to make out his face, he gets you in a choke hold, and puts you to sleep. You wake up in a small cell, unable to figure out which part of the dungeon you are in. You notice that there is a large statue in the center of the chamber, but it's too tall to see it all of the way into the darkness. You begin to look around the cell for an exit, but alas, your efforts are in vein. Three tall figures approach the cell, and begin to unlock the gate. Thousands of thoughts rush through your head, "I am going to die!", "Do I have a fighting chance?", "This is the end, Ijust need to accept it". They unlock the gate and pull you out. A soon as you exit the cell, the lights flicker on, illuminating the entire room. "Surprise!" You look around and see all of you loved ones enjoying cake and icecream. You look up and realize that the tall statue, is of you. It is a surprize birthday party. You sit down and enjoy cake and icecream.

How was that?
And, MZ, it was just supposed to be a small game where you make your way through a dungeon, testing your wits. You are no particular class, it's not like a full RPG with goblins and imps, and whatever else you see in medieval RPGs.

I liked will's narration the most, can someone continue based on my choices?

Quote from StarBlue

... *sigh* screw this, I make a map for nothing, you didn't even make it to the chamber yet, and cpt. Will is randomely taking control even after I made the map, I made the rules, I marked clues. There were no clues yet, because you didn't even make it to the first corridor where you find the corpse in a jail cell. Whatever, I quit... >_>

QQ.

Quote from Norm

I liked will's narration the most, can someone continue based on my choices?

This. I'd definitely be in on the Cappytan's version. Less spelling and grammatical errors, smaller post, and less assumption of people's thoughts.

yeah... agreed, but, I quit.

West.



Lawl, lock plz.

Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Jun 23 2010, 8:11 pm by LoTu)S.

You have moved into a dark place.
It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

Shall I have a go at narration?





Oh, man, the hotel wifi disconnected me while I was typing, and when I submitted, I almost lost the post! I was about to strangle somebody!

EDIT: StarBlue, other than your lack of narration, this is a really good idea -- having a map, lives, and all. Perhaps a partnership between you and the best narrator (whoever that may be) could be formed: you can map, keep track of lives, other stuff, and they write.

Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Jun 24 2010, 1:43 am by DavidJCobb.

Quote from DavidJCobb

the best narrator (whoever that may be)

*cough* will *cough*

Yeah, I keep getting told that I have good ideas, yet I screw them up >_>

Excellent narration @David, though perhaps it puts thoughts in the player's head a bit too much. In text-adventure games I've played (and I played a fair few in my younger years) the narration usually describes the scene without reference to the player's reaction unless it is absolutely necessary, e.g. if they touch a hot stove it burns them and they withdraw their hand.

If one of these stories is going to be played on this forum I advise that we agree on the "form" of it here and then create a new topic for the game itself, to avoid confusion. I think the game should play like an old text adventure in that the players can take actions besides moving in a direction, but that these actions should be relevant to the situation and not ridiculous - not "Drop your pants and moon at the Demon", for example. Push, Pull, Take, Give, Talk etc. should be acceptable, as well as other common actions. We have the advantage that we are not constrained by the limited comprehension of a text game interpreter, and as narrators can give appropriate responses to almost anything the player chooses to do.

The lives mechanic is a good one, but I think it should be incorporated in a realistic way. So you start with 6 "lives" for example, and taking a "death" action causes something bad to happen but you narrowly escape death and lose a "life". For example you might pull on a rope and an anvil plunges through a hatch in the ceiling towards your head, but you dive out of the way. I recommend calling them "Luck Points" or something similar.

A hints system could also be a welcome feature of the game. The player character could have some sort of instinctive ability to spot solutions to problems, and it would be represented in the game by a special action players can only take every x number of moves. If the action is used then strong advice on how to proceed is given.

Anybody have some thoughts?

I pick west

Just one: Will is awesome.

But seriously, I love all your recommendations.