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break up with a girl, without later sabotage?
Nov 25 2012, 5:18 pm
By: ClansAreForGays
Pages: 1 2 3 >
 

Nov 25 2012, 5:18 pm ClansAreForGays Post #1



So like 6 months ago my girlfriend dumps me, in a pretty painless split. She would drag me to this bible study with tons of hot desperate single girls while we dated, but she stopped going when we broke up. I still went and ask one of the girls out.

Now let me back track a bit here and tell you about Shannon. Shannon is a loud pathetic lonely fat girl who somewhat recently started going to the bible study. She often breaks down in tears talking about how the people at the last study she went to would, "lie about her, saying that she caused drama" and how her ex cheated on her and dumped her. She quickly became overly "best friends" with all the girls at our bible study, expunging the evils of men. Coincidentally my gf broke up with me a little while later. I would catch shannon glaring at me sometimes after the split.

So anyways I ask this new girl out on a date, who is friends with shannon, but never met my ex. It was kind of an awkward date, but not too bad. Anyways I see Shannon on facebook chatting up new girl, and hanging out with her every day. New girl drops off the face of the earth. I shalk it up to the bad date at the time.

Fast forward 6 months. Feeling lonely, so I show up to the bible study again. Meet new-new girl who just starts going. 10/10. I chat her up, with Shannon lurking in the distance. We go on an awesome date, meet her parents, seal it with awesome make out session. Go on facebook, see that Shannon and her are now friends, and she invited her to a picnic.

It's been 3 days now, and 10/10 girl has dropped off the face of the earth too.

Has anyone else had to deal with a Shannon? If so, words of advice? Something that doesn't involve murder, I've thought about that enough lately.




Nov 25 2012, 5:44 pm Sacrieur Post #2

Still Napping

Quote
Has anyone else had to deal with a Shannon? If so, words of advice? Something that doesn't involve murder, I've thought about that enough lately.

Well it's difficult if you tie my hands like that.

Maybe she's just been busy, or something. Trust me though, a girl that easily manipulated probably isn't worth keeping around, unless you want a trophy wife or something.



None.

Nov 25 2012, 5:53 pm Fire_Kame Post #3

Stupid babies need the most attention

There's other girls out there, I'd find a different single's group to chat up. I'd steer clear of Shannon - girls like her can fuck shit up bad. Continuing to go to that small group is going to give you a bad reputation, even if you haven't done anything wrong, and will make Shannon seem more "right."




Nov 25 2012, 6:59 pm CecilSunkure Post #4



You really need to first talk to new-new girl and figure out what the fuck is going on. Walk up to her in person, and ask if you can talk for a moment. She can't say no unless "she's busy", and if "she's busy" be sure to try talking to her in person as soon as possible.

Now if new-new girl just flat out says no and avoids you... Well then you have a crazy Shannon and lots of new girls that like to gossip more than they do get to know people; avoid them all.

If you really feel up for it you can try talking directly to Shannon in person, alone, after you try talking with new-new girl. However if the girl is really conniving she's going to just lie to you and try to pretend like she's not doing anything behind the scenes.



None.

Nov 25 2012, 8:51 pm JaFF Post #5



Hahaha!

Never had to deal with a Shannon myself, but my suggestion would be to find another place to get girls that does not contain said Shannon.



None.

Nov 25 2012, 9:08 pm Mini Moose 2707 Post #6

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I posted it in the shoutbox already, but here you go again:

Quote
[12:23 pm] Mini Moose 2707 -- What if Shannon is actually the good person here, weeding out the women who won't really commit and devote themselves to you? :wob:
[12:22 pm] Mini Moose 2707 -- Should I ask you the tricky question of do you really want to be with a girl who would stop seeing you because of what Shannon does anyway? ^^





Nov 25 2012, 9:33 pm Fire_Kame Post #7

Stupid babies need the most attention

Quote from Mini Moose 2707
[12:22 pm] Mini Moose 2707 -- Should I ask you the tricky question of do you really want to be with a girl who would stop seeing you because of what Shannon does anyway? ^^

This x1000000




Nov 25 2012, 10:05 pm Sacrieur Post #8

Still Napping

If she's really worth it, then you've got to be very confident and self-assured.

Confront Shannon. Record the conversation you have with her discreetly, and don't be too passive aggressive about what you say. Avoid double meanings or clever speech and be very straight forward and respectful. When it's all over, you'll have the entire thing recorded -- don't tell her you had recorded it. She will probably run off and tell the troupe about how vile you were to her.

Next, confront your girl, bring up your evidence, and you'll be able to prove you're actually innocent of whatever she's been saying about you. She'll be kicked out of the group or shunned, and you and your trophy wife can live happily ever after.



None.

Nov 25 2012, 10:27 pm Fire_Kame Post #9

Stupid babies need the most attention

Record the conversation?! If he doesn't have a bad vibe already in the group, that's probably going to make it worse.




Nov 25 2012, 10:54 pm Sacrieur Post #10

Still Napping

She'll be the one caught lying.



None.

Nov 25 2012, 11:24 pm Azrael Post #11



Quote from CecilSunkure
You really need to first talk to new-new girl and figure out what the fuck is going on. Walk up to her in person, and ask if you can talk for a moment. She can't say no unless "she's busy", and if "she's busy" be sure to try talking to her in person as soon as possible.

Now if new-new girl just flat out says no and avoids you... Well then you have a crazy Shannon and lots of new girls that like to gossip more than they do get to know people; avoid them all.

This is as much as you can do to rectify things with the new girl.

Quote from CecilSunkure
If you really feel up for it you can try talking directly to Shannon in person, alone, after you try talking with new-new girl. However if the girl is really conniving she's going to just lie to you and try to pretend like she's not doing anything behind the scenes.

I wouldn't recommend this, for the reason stated at the end. All you'll do is give her ammunition, she can and likely would blow whatever you say way out of proportion and use it to fuel her vendetta against you.

Your goal should be to remove Shannon from the picture entirely, even if it requires blocking her on Facebook and finding new people to associate with.

Quote from Mini Moose 2707
[12:22 pm] Mini Moose 2707 -- Should I ask you the tricky question of do you really want to be with a girl who would stop seeing you because of what Shannon does anyway? ^^

It's probably not just her, but the entire circle who she's poisoned the minds of for the last 6 months. Anyone who has some basic social finesse and makes it their life goal to destroy you can have catastrophic implications on your life.

A better question is, would you really want to be with a girl who's so desperate for anyone she can get that she ignores all the nasty things everyone says about you even though she just met you and has literally no way of knowing better? It'd be one thing if she'd gotten to know you, but she hasn't. You can't blame her, the fault lies in the fat loser girl purposely sabotaging you.

If you want to possibly salvage the relationship, you'll need to talk to the new girl directly, as Cecil described.

After that, you need to remove Shannon as a threat. This could mean leaving the group, or alternatively, removing her influence over the group by making her look bad (like something Sacrieur was describing, except no direct interaction with her, as you'd want to remain entirely anonymous). The safest and easiest method is to simply block every member of the group and never go back again.




Nov 26 2012, 1:17 am ClansAreForGays Post #12



Quote from Sacrieur
If she's really worth it, then you've got to be very confident and self-assured.

Confront Shannon. Record the conversation you have with her discreetly, and don't be too passive aggressive about what you say. Avoid double meanings or clever speech and be very straight forward and respectful. When it's all over, you'll have the entire thing recorded -- don't tell her you had recorded it. She will probably run off and tell the troupe about how vile you were to her.

Next, confront your girl, bring up your evidence, and you'll be able to prove you're actually innocent of whatever she's been saying about you. She'll be kicked out of the group or shunned, and you and your trophy wife can live happily ever after.
I like this.
Also, just finished telling my side to a girl that's also in the group, but a bit of an outsider. She told me Shannon leads an all women bible study, that my ex went to, and basically called her out for doing unchristian things with me. She never told me any of this. So basically she hates me for doing naughty things with my adult girlfriend(at the time). Alicia, the mole, tells me she hates her and gets a very manipulative feeling from her.
What I really want to do is find this other bible study, and learn why they really kicked her out, and how to do it here.




Nov 26 2012, 1:45 am Dem0n Post #13

ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

This sounds like the plot to some movie in which you keep digging for the truth when you know you shouldn't, and at the end, you find something that you don't like. :crazy:

..anyone here know how to make movies?



Memes gather, and now my watch begins. It shall not end until my death. I shall take no wife, hold no lands, father no children. I shall wear no crowns and win no glory. I shall live and die at my post. I am the sword in the darkness. I am the memer on the walls. I am the shield that guards the realms of memes. I pledge my life and honor to the Meme's Watch, for this meme and all the memes to come.

Nov 26 2012, 1:48 am Fire_Kame Post #14

Stupid babies need the most attention

Quote from Sacrieur
She'll be the one caught lying.
You'll be caught as the creep with the recording device.




Nov 26 2012, 2:18 am TiKels Post #15



Quote from Fire_Kame
Quote from Sacrieur
She'll be the one caught lying.
You'll be caught as the creep with the recording device.
There's really just so much wrong with sacrieur's advice in practice.

Here's a list of reasons why it doesn't work!

1. The end objective is to have her opinion of you change into something desirable, but nobody regularly records conversations to prove a point, and doing so would make her label you as a crepe. It's just a really weird stalkerish thing to do, even if it does end up "incriminating" Shannon (which is entirely unlikely, but I'll get back to that).

2. It will make you look like you're really desperate for her because you're going to extreme lengths and haven't even hardly met this girl.

3. Getting back to the unlikelihood of it incriminating Shannon. You run the risk of Shannon not even saying anything about you approaching her. You run the risk of her not saying anything specific about you approaching her (e.g. "He talked to me to try to convince me that men aren't terrible, only a sex-desperate fiend would do this!") and thereby showing the recording only fits exactly what she was saying or doing nothing at all. The only way for it to make you look less bad (ignoring all the ways it would make you look bad anyway) is if she takes exact phrases you used and twists them, which is not going to happen in any reasonable circumstance.

Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Nov 26 2012, 2:33 am by TiKels.



None.

Nov 26 2012, 6:01 am Sand Wraith Post #16

she*

Don't do the recording thing except for your own personal reference that you do not share ever. I would not suggest doing it in the first place unless you can discreetly record it with a device that you normally carry with you so as not to arouse suspicion. If you get caught, whether you "clear" your name or not, you will end up as someone suspicious.

Try to find more information about Shannon on the net, if possible. Internet has a very large collection of information. E-mail addresses, names, connected organizations, random wall posts on her Facebook may lead to clues about the group she was kicked from. I'm sure you've tried this before though.

What I want to ask though is why not just date Alicia the mole. Maybe you are waiting to execute some sort of covert intelligence operation with her as your partner so you can get into an embarrassing situation with her, bond, and then eventually realize your latent love for Alicia?!

You should consider increasing your relationship with Alicia whether by using mutual hatred for Shannon or a like for each other.

If you really want to kick Shannon out of the current bible group (why not just leave the bible group altogether?), having Alicia on good terms with you would be extremely helpful. You might be able to convince her to investigate Shannon through other girls who are deeper in Shannon's circle than herself but not deep enough to distrust Alicia. You may be able to slowly, layer by later, deconstruct the individual components to Shannon's network in order to build up a profile of Shannon herself, even if you cannot get any direct information about Shannon. Such as by identifying those who dislike her, why they dislike her, and identifying those who do like her and why they like her.

In other words, do some thorough covert scouting before deciding what major course of action to take.




Nov 27 2012, 11:14 pm poison_us Post #17

Back* from the grave

Hire a hitman. If you paid me in layers, I'd get rid of her and the body.[/joke]

Yeah, the recording thing is a very bad idea, for reasons already mentioned. Namely it'll make you look bad, even if it does send her out of the group. Your goal here is to get rid of her or make her ineffective at removing women from your life, not risk any social standing you may still have in this group at a chance people will think highly of you for your actions. Best bet is to talk to her directly about it. Around others. She will lie, but even the best liars aren't able to keep others from getting suspicious, and maybe that's all it'll take. Hopefulness aside, when she does lie, don't directly call her on it. Simply put more evidence in front of her, never directly questioning her credibility. Soon enough, the people around will be able to recognize she's manipulating them. If not, then you're never going to be able to get her out of the picture. This girl feeds on manipulating others, and when she can't fuck people over anymore, she'll leave.

Though I've got to disagree with Azrael on his point of credibility. Yes, I can understand that a new girl doesn't really know Clans that well, but after a date and previous chatting, she should have a decently good idea of if you're some kind of creepy serial killer/stalker/sadist. Seriously, I can't see how one fat manipulative swine could corrupt another girl's view of you enough to make her completely and totally avoid you after a good date. Hell, you even called it a 10/10; you met her parents and made out, likely after a good meal too. So I'm not convinced it's all Shannon's fault. Maybe you do give off some creeper vibe and Shannon is simply putting the magnifying glass to the ant and burning you for something you don't even know about.

I doubt it, though. Women do have a way of becoming a hive-mind, simply because they believe other women who never do things to hurt each other at all. Right?

Walk up to Shannon and ask her out on a date. Gentlemanly. Preferably around others so she can't say you cornered her and threw yourself at her, and she had to fight you off with one hand as the other held her dress down amid your unwanted clutches. Worst comes to worst (now that I think about it, this is actually better), she hates you more, woopdie do. You've already got her hating you because you have an outtie in your nether region. If she actually accepts (heaven forbid a good girl would; men are the devil and any contact, no matter how fleeting, is paramount to flirting with the devil himself), kudos to you bro. Now, desirable though this cow may be, simply take her out to dinner (NOT a fancy place, this cunt doesn't deserve it). Maybe a movie? Either way, show her you're not a bad guy, and you're not after her for her smokin' bod. Here's the real trick: pretend you don't want to do anything more than a hug. Treat her nicely at all times, and even go out of your way to be overly formal. She'll either love it, and you can work your way out somehow or another, or she'll hate it and end it.

Now, the above scenario where she accepts doesn't have an exit strategy; it doesn't need one. She won't say yes. I mean, simply looking at a man with anything but hate must be the equivalent of a long, passionate night under the covers for her. Simply put, you acted the gentleman in this scenario. Nowadays people are getting increasingly stupid and blind, yet even the people in your bible group must realize what this implies.

Since the previous three paragraphs are probably not gonna happen, find as much information out about Shannon as possible. Your mole would be the perfect way, considering she's not immediately the enemy for having the ability to pee standing. Full, real name, phone number, etc. You could spread all of this information by posting slanderous things online, destroying bathroom stalls by scratching her number and some vague sexual innuendo (call for a good time), etc.

Since that paragraph will probably not happen, considering that may get you in legal trouble if the wrong kinds of people get a hold of the info and it gets traced back to you as the person publicly dishing it out, you could always just pick up girls at some other place. I mean, it almost sounds like you only go to this bible study for or because of women. Seriously, you started going with your ex, and you kept going seemingly for the desperate girls. Maybe it's time to re-evaluate yourself, bro. Just lay off the ladies for a bit, killer. I know it sounds silly, but she may not have been kicked out of the group. Maybe men just quit putting themselves in her line of fire, and this extreme feminist got bored. Maybe she left because she wanted some shmuck like you (no offense intended) to try to get with women around her.





Nov 28 2012, 8:45 pm LoveLess Post #18

Let me show you how to hump without making love.

I have a lot of experience with women, here is my advice:

The thing with girls like Shannon, is that they like to surround themselves with people that will listen to her and it's how she feels good about herself. It's not so much that the woman has been burned by a lot of guys, it's usually because their friends all walked out on them at some point in their life and got desperately lonely. Usually her being in a relationship with some guy that "destroyed" her friendship with other people, though it was her and all of the friends she had thought he was a bitch, so stopped talking to her. Now what she does, is collect friends like they are precious objects and will do it through the easiest medium: Your Shannon, is using these women who have severe trust issues and abusing that fact, to get them to become her friends. The fact that there is religion involved, makes it even easier for her to do this because she can twist God's "words" to fit her own agenda.

Now dealing with a Shannon isn't that easy, sadly. Now based on the information given, if you really want to date one of these chicks, you will have to commit a lot faster to a relationship with her. This is what the women in these type of groups want, someone that needs them. This is their thing, they want someone to smother them and become attached. The shitty thing is, that you have to do so without flinging any mud whatsoever. Doing so will result in one of two scenarios:
  • You will get a very insecure relationship that is pretty much destined to fail because you invited drama into it. Everything will become very secretive and the girl will usually become even more insecure than she already was.
  • You could possibly just destroy any chance you have of getting another decent woman from these groups, ever. Just don't bring up these issues you have with the whole Shannon situation.

The best thing to do, like I said, is quickly become a pillar of the girl's life. Be there for her, be what Shannon is becoming in their minds. Someone that they want to have in their life. The only edge you have over Shannon is that you are a guy, which to a girl, can offer more security than a woman could.

Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Nov 28 2012, 11:12 pm by Mini Moose 2707. Reason: Please don't insult the userbase.



None.

Nov 28 2012, 8:56 pm Azrael Post #19



Quote from poison_us
Walk up to Shannon and ask her out on a date.
That seems like a bad idea, considering she's probably telling the other girls that he's a creep who uses the bible study group to prey on girls, that he's a desperate sleazeball that will screw anything that moves, etc.

Post has been edited 2 time(s), last time on Nov 28 2012, 11:12 pm by Mini Moose 2707. Reason: Response to an edited quote.




Nov 28 2012, 9:06 pm Fire_Kame Post #20

Stupid babies need the most attention

Quote from LoveLess
I have a lot of experience with women, here is my advice:

The thing with girls like Shannon, is that they like to surround themselves with people that will listen to her and it's how she feels good about herself. It's not so much that the woman has been burned by a lot of guys, it's usually because their friends all walked out on them at some point in their life and got desperately lonely. Usually her being in a relationship with some guy that "destroyed" her friendship with other people, though it was her and all of the friends she had thought he was a bitch, so stopped talking to her. Now what she does, is collect friends like they are precious objects and will do it through the easiest medium: Your Shannon, is using these women who have severe trust issues and abusing that fact, to get them to become her friends. The fact that there is religion involved, makes it even easier for her to do this because she can twist God's "words" to fit her own agenda.

Now dealing with a Shannon isn't that easy, sadly. Now based on the information given, if you really want to date one of these chicks, you will have to commit a lot faster to a relationship with her. This is what the women in these type of groups want, someone that needs them. This is their thing, they want someone to smother them and become attached. The shitty thing is, that you have to do so without flinging any mud whatsoever. Doing so will result in one of two scenarios:
  • You will get a very insecure relationship that is pretty much destined to fail because you invited drama into it. Everything will become very secretive and the girl will usually become even more insecure than she already was.
  • You could possibly just destroy any chance you have of getting another decent woman from these groups, ever. Just don't bring up these issues you have with the whole Shannon situation.

The best thing to do, like I said, is quickly become a pillar of the girl's life. Be there for her, be what Shannon is becoming in their minds. Someone that they want to have in their life. The only edge you have over Shannon is that you are a guy, which to a girl, can offer more security than a woman could.
Since I am a woman, I think you'd be wrong on that. But...there is truth to the rest of your post. However If you get more serious quicker with a girl in the group, you're going end up in a territory battle with Shannon, probably for the rest of your relationship. Is it worth it?

Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Nov 28 2012, 11:26 pm by DevliN. Reason: Edited quote.




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the gay autotune really turned me off but it was informative
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LoveLess -- Ahli
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Yeah but... I dunno, 50/50?
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