I wrote a little ditty that goes something like this, and i call it little because it's four lines long. Not meant to be long so, Don't say "It's too short" [COLOR=hotpink]I wanted to write a song or a rhyme, a somewhat long one that would pass the time, but then i realized time has it's limits, and if i waste too much baby, we wont be in it.[/COLOR]

I wrote a little ditty that goes something like this, and i call it little because it's four lines long. Not meant to be long so, Don't say "It's too short"

I wanted to write a song or a rhyme, a somewhat long one that would pass the time, but then i realized time has it's limits, and if i waste too much baby, we wont be in it.

1. I have better spelling than you. 2. It doesn't even rhyme.

1. I have better spelling than you.
2. It doesn't even rhyme.

Mildly catchy, but I don't see why your trying to pass the time then waste it. USE THE TIME!

Mildly catchy, but I don't see why your trying to pass the time then waste it.
USE THE TIME!

It's too short. No, there's a point where "it's meant to be short" isn't an excuse. 4 lines is barely any work. Especially when the poem doesn't rhyme or follow some other ruleset for a poem. Also, spellcheck.

It's too short.
No, there's a point where "it's meant to be short" isn't an excuse.
4 lines is barely any work. Especially when the poem doesn't rhyme or follow some other ruleset for a poem.
Also, spellcheck.

[quote=moneylover][quote=candle12345]It's too short. No, there's a point where "it's meant to be short" isn't an excuse. 4 lines is barely any work. Especially when the poem doesn't rhyme or follow some other ruleset for a poem. Also, spellcheck.[/quote] 4 lines is plenty for a poem. It's actually five? [quote=ToA][COLOR=hotpink]I wanted to write a song or a rhyme, a [B]somewhat long one that would[/B] pass the time, but then I realized time has it's limits, and if I waste too much baby, we won't be in it.[/COLOR][/quote][/quote] Shorten the bolded part, it sounds wordy. Make it like 'a pretty one, that would pass the time' or something simpler?

Quote from moneylover

Quote from candle12345

It's too short.
No, there's a point where "it's meant to be short" isn't an excuse.
4 lines is barely any work. Especially when the poem doesn't rhyme or follow some other ruleset for a poem.
Also, spellcheck.

4 lines is plenty for a poem. It's actually five?

Quote from ToA

I wanted to write a song or a rhyme,
a somewhat long one that would pass the time,
but then I realized time has it's limits,
and if I waste too much baby,
we won't be in it.

Shorten the bolded part, it sounds wordy. Make it like 'a pretty one, that would pass the time' or something simpler?

- double post -

- double post -

- wtf, triple post... - I can't report my own posts...

- wtf, triple post... -

I can't report my own posts...