Luke it is.

You awaken from the bottom bunk of your DORM BUNK-BED, squinting because you are pretty much BLIND. You can barely see your alarm clock, so you equip your READING GLASSES, allowing you to see that it's 3:00 AM, and you wonder why you've woken up so early. You check your ANDROID SMARTPHONE to see if anyone has tried to contact you. No one has tried to contact you except for that guy everyone hates (who only has one charisma!) who thinks that you are his friend because you are SOCIALLY AWKWARD (low charisma) just as he is, but you consider yourself too cool for him. You feel like your body is CRUMBLING (low endurance) and you are very HUNGRY. Your stomach yearns for delicious early morning sustenance. REGINALD, your DORM-MATE, snores loudly. You aren't very AGILE and this causes you to make quite a bit of noise as you scramble from your BED. REGINALD snores louder and even makes a few noises from his mouth.

You are an 18 year old college freshman named Luke majoring in zombie lore.

What will you do?

Wake up Reginald (hold hand over his nose and mouth if necessary, not long enough for him to realize what you did to him though) and then convince him to get you breakfast.

Grab a random weapon from the room, then look outside to see if there is a zombie uprising outside. All while making lots of noises sufficient to wake REGINALD up. When he wakes up, convinces him to get you breakfast (while preparing to defend yourself with the prementioned weapon)

Go onto your college's website and change your major to engineering.

Then sign up for ROTC.

Then compile a list of everyone you know at this college.

You find a piece of the BUNK BED that broke off, but you don't have the STRENGTH to equip it, so instead you find a NEWSPAPER and equip it in your HANDS slot. Looking outside of your window, you can't make out any zombies but the sky is rather dark and a few dark figures are walking around as far as you can see. You weakly begin shaking the bed, and later shake REGINALD, which wakes him up.

"Mmm... nya... wh- what the fuck do you want LUKE?" says REGINALD, just waking up. You hold your NEWSPAPER in a defensive stance.

"Can... can you make me breakfast pretty please with cherries on top?"

"Ugh, if it will shut you up..."

REGINALD takes out a small bowl and pours LUCKY CHARMS in it, then goes back to sleep.





Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Sep 1 2011, 1:15 am by lil-Inferno.

Shout: "fuck this shit" and go to your local Census office and change your name to Aguerill A'ppearson.

"You know what, fuck the name Luke."

You may have had the same name tagged on yourself for over 18 years, but screw it! Before heading out, you remember to pick up your WALLET INVENTORY, as you may need some cash. Thanks to your RANDOM LUCK you realize that the local census office is right next to your campus. You take a rather slow walk to the building, but when you arrive you realize that it's CLOSED, and legally changing your name costs a fee of $322 in your state. You're only $272 off!

You decide you could just tell your friends (the ones you have, at least) to call you Aguerill A'ppearson. You're now outside of the CENSUS BUILDING, but you're still HUNGRY as you left the LUCKY CHARMS uneaten!

Go home, eat, get ready for the day (shower, get dressed, brush teeth, comb hair, etc), then go outside. Find someone walking around, approach them and comment on something nice and relatable about them even if it's not true, like "hey I like your shoes, I have that same pair back home". Carry on a friendly conversation with them from this leading comment. Casually ask them their name at some point. When the conversation is coming to a close, ask them for directions to one of your zombie lore classes. Follow by saying "hey, could I get your cell number in case I have any other questions?" If they give it to you, enter it into your smartphone.

Edit: Also, if you go to take out your smartphone, say "wow I can't believe that, it looks like I forgot my wallet. I guess I'm not getting any lunch today" even though you actually have your wallet. Say it in a defeated tone that attempts to make them feel bad about it. If they offer to give you some money, be like "are you sure?" but be sure to take what you can get.

Post has been edited 2 time(s), last time on Sep 1 2011, 1:44 am by Azrael.Wrath.

Stacking perception is only for lazy, unimaginative players.

Oh. Did we stop bitching about stats?

Go walk around town until you find a homeless man. Try and steal his hat/jar filled with money. Quite possibly fail. Lose morality. Profit.

Edit: Or use charisma and talk him into giving you money. Surely our 5 perception will make sure the homeless man isn't a skag addict and holding a dirty needle with which to defend his meagre loot stash.

Edit Edit: Try and sell your Smart Phone for at least $150 (not sure on it's exact specifications or what FUCKED UP CRAZY country, which protects homeless people and forces you to pay for name changes is - this game is in...) Purchase a cheap Nokia for 5% of total profit made from selling android.

Post has been edited 2 time(s), last time on Sep 1 2011, 1:54 am by Cardinal.

All this, with LUCKY CHARMS for breakfast included.

Also, check the newspaper for job openings while eating the bowl of lucky charms.

You head back to your dorm and consume your delicious LUCKY CHARMS. Your hunger is cured. It's now 5:00 AM, and you decide to get a preemptive HYGIENE session before the dorm bathrooms are taken up by other students. You also take a short NAP because you're slightly TIRED. You wake up at 8:00 AM. REGINALD has already left the DORM. You decide to go exploring and find a girl sitting alone near the campus' fountain and decide to strike a conversation.

"Hey uh... nice footwear. I have those same ones back at thee uh... ranch." You then realize she's wearing UGS.

"Did you forget to bring them with you? Loser..." She looks at your feet. You then realize you're BAREFOOT!

"Well what's your name?"

"Alyssa."

"Alyssa, where can I find my zombie lore classes?"

"...Zombie lore? Don't talk to me you loser, I'm a liberal arts major."

You now don't know where your ZOMBIE LORE classes are but you have made an ACQUAINTANCE, and you decide to head out into town. A HOMELESS MAN is backed against the wall of a building in your campus. He seems to be the victim of unemployment and a bad economy, not that of a drug or alcohol addiction, and he has a grizzly beard. He is holding a BAG, it's full of COINS but you can't tell how many. You try to talk him into letting you have some MONEY but it's quite obvious that he needs it more, and he keeps most of it for himself. He gives up $0.28 only because you aren't wearing any SHOES and he is aware of the HOBO CODE, but you attempt to SWIPE the BAG for more and you are barely AGILE enough to swiftly take it, and pass it off like you stumbled. You are AWKWARD ENOUGH that he believes you, but you gain a point of EVIL KARMA for attempting a theft. There are no pawn shops or otherwise to sell your ANDROID SMARTPHONE to. You are still holding your NEWSPAPER, and aren't wearing any SHOES.

Note: you have made your first acquaintance, with their own 'friend rating', but you made a bad first impression. If an acquaintance has -100% to -50% they are considered an enemy. -49% to 49% and they're considered an acquaintance. 50% to 100% and they're considered a friend.







Post has been edited 1 time(s), last time on Sep 1 2011, 3:13 am by lil-Inferno.

Question, is it possible for friend ratings to go above 100%, if say, we get really really close? Or is 100% the limit?

I thought there was a forum rule to only have one of these going at a time.

Look for a map of the campus and locate first zombie lore class.

100% is the limit. At that point you're good pals.
You decide zombie lore sucks as a major, but you lack a COMPUTER with which to change your major and you need to get to CLASS, so taking a pit stop is out of the question! As you head out of your dorm building you pick up a MILITARY RESERVE pamphlet, but ultimately decide to take a peek at it later, and store it in your RIGHT POCKET. You also un-equip your NEWSPAPER, and tuck it in your LEFT POCKET.

You really only know two people at this college, and that would be Reginald and now Alyssa. You add REGINALD to your ACQUAINTANCE LOG.

Near the campus fountain where you found Alyssa is a stand-up map saying "YOU ARE HERE" and labeling all the major buildings. According to the map legend, the ZOMBIE LORE classes are held in the B-WING BUILDING. You head there, still barefooted.

Go home and put shoes on, and check your wallet to see what bills you have (two twenties and a ten?), then put it away. Go back out and look for someone to talk to, preferably Alyssa. Try to get the person to like you. If it seems like things went well, ask for their name and number (assuming you don't have their name). If you take your phone out to add them, comment on not having your wallet and being able to get lunch in an attempt to get them to offer you money.

Search dorm room for any useful items I can fit in my pocket. i.e. pocket knife