Are there any ways I can get iTunes to read FLAC sound files on Windows 7?
I've tried some programs recommended on the interwebz, but they aren't working.

I just stay away from FLAC files......

http://flac.sourceforge.net/download.html
Just download and install it. Any decent media player can use external codecs.

Sorry for being noob, but how is this supposed to make iTunes love FLAC files?

flac is a free lossless audio codec. Since it's a codec, media players use that codec to decode the compressed audio and play the raw data through your speakers. Many audio players have built in internal codec filters, but there are no media players which can play ever single file, so you have to rely on external filters. Any decent media player will search for the external codec installed on your system if the file will not play with the internal codecs. There's also usually a plugin folder to put the filter in.

That will, not, however, work with a media player. Even if it works with iTunes, it won't be able to sync flac files with an iPod.

Something tells me it won't sync .flac files, but it will sync .mp3/mp4/any extension the iPod can recognize. Thus you should be able to put the flac files on the iPod by changing the extension. The iPod won't be able to read it without the filter installed though, and as far as I know, apple is incredibly closed source with their iPod OS, so there's no chance of getting the file to play on that OS. You can also just copy/paste the files onto the iPod, but of course, the iPod's OS doesn't recognize audio files transferred in that way.

I don't have any problems playing wma/vorbis/flac/mpg/aac/a52/mpc on my 30 GB iPod since I don't use the iPod OS.